Friday 11 January 2013

Needing the toilet...

Ok, so I bet you're wondering why I'm thankful for needing the toilet......


Well, wonder no longer.


The need to go the toilet is a multifaceted gift.


Firstly, for those who are completely stagnant in their lives - commonly referred to as couch potatoes - the bowels needs prevent them from getting bed sores, A.K.A. pressure ulcers. So, it ensures that super-lazy people get at least enough exercise to circulate the blood around their body a handful of times a day. Few.

Secondly, no matter where you are, it is an excuse to have a breather - if you're in a lecture, or meeting, if you're at the gym, or having an argument with someone, on a plane, on a date, literally anything, it is excusable.

After all...            When the bladder's calling, there's no stalling



Thirdly, it's quite a miraculous release. Only a really hearty sneeze can compare to the release of a good Jimmy Riddle (thats Piddle for those who don't know). And even then, we're talking a close call.


Fourthly, the colour of your wee helps you to keep a track on your hydration levels... watch out for a green tea colour, or mustard yellow... how else would you know to drink more water!?

Fifthly, it cleans your booty after a poopy.. but that's a bit crude, so shhhhh..

Thank goodness for the gift of toilet-going.

SO, next time you feel the urge, know that it's not just a nuisance, but a circulatory back-up system, a hydration indicator, an unobjectionable escape and undeniable spontaneous retreat! And then, sit down, relax, and let the bliss of release flow through your miraculous body.

Thanks for reading, see you tomorrow 

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